It Happens

by | Mar 20, 2016 | Fiction, Flash fiction | 4 comments

I think writing flash fiction is great mental exercise. I’ll be taking this 100-word story to my critique group Monday evening to see what they have to say. What do you think?

She kicks gravel into the koi pond. A step away, he gazes at the moon. Their fingertips touch, separate, touch again.

So, this is it, then. She puts her hands in her hoodie.

His hand turns, palm up—an invitation. Doesn’t seem right, he says, you leavin’ me.

But you love her; you told me so. She pivots away.

Don’t be that way, he says. It happens, that’s all, like the moon glowing, the fish in the water, the pebbles.

She steals into the night, hopes receding with each stride. He studies the murky water. The koi flee.

 

Note: I’ve removed pictures from this post and others created around the same time, because that’s when this site began loading very slowly. No one has been able to figure out why. I’ve changed all kinds of things, including my web host. Now I’m going to see if deleting pictures posted when the problem began will help.

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Influenced by folklore and magical realism, The Kiminee Dream is a lyrical story with characters equally charmed and challenged while living where the ordinary and miraculous coexist seamlessly. If you like depth as well as whimsy, arresting twists, and details that rouse your senses, you’ll love what is both an eloquent exploration of acceptance and a tender tribute to the people of Illinois.

4 Comments

  1. Jennifer Viereck

    Wonderful. You are a word master.

  2. admin

    Thank you for your supportive comment, Jennifer. Did you know that I will always appreciate you for recommending me to Public Media Center way back when? I also appreciate your activism in the world and like being in touch.

  3. Barbara Toboni

    Another goodie to gobble up. I especially like how the coy are used as a metaphor. She’s better off without him, and the coy have it all figured out too.

  4. admin

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this, Barb. I enjoy the way we comment on one another’s creative writing posts. It is wonderfully mutually supportive. … The end was just this intuitive sort of thing. I saw the koi speed away in my mind’s eye and knew I had to go with that and leave him there alone.

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