Obsidian Waves

by | Jan 7, 2013 | Fiction, Flash fiction | 18 comments

I wrote this story in response to Lillie McFerrin’s five-sentence fiction prompt, midnight. She typically posts a new prompt weekly at http://lilliemcferrin.com, and I enjoy participating when I can.

Obsidian Waves
By Laura McHale Holland

4268314137_5a3ef92ee3_nHer name wasn’t even Midnight. That’s just what I called her because her face was framed with obsidian waves, and she painted her nails and lips to match. She had an air of mystery about her, too, especially when she would play her flute by the streetlight after dark, and I would watch from my bedroom window and sway in time to her music.

She was my Midnight, you see, until some guy rolled up in a BMW one night and said, “It’s time to come home, Paula.” And so she left.

Yet some nights when I’m about to fall asleep, I sense her music in the air; I rush to the window, but in the streetlight’s glow, the sidewalk is bare; she is never there.

Photo by Horia Varlan

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18 Comments

  1. Eve Trout

    I want more. I like it so far.

  2. Marie

    I love this, Laura. And it reminded me of one of the first stories I ever wrote, so I sent a story about it!

  3. K R Smith

    Good work! I like stories like this that let you know there’s another story behind the obvious one.

  4. admin

    Thanks for your reading this story and leaving a comment, Eve! I hadn’t intended to do more than this, but we’ll see.

  5. admin

    Thanks, Marie! Where did you send the story? I’d like to read it. :o)

  6. admin

    Thank you for your comment, KR, and for appreciating that which is not said.

  7. injaynesworld

    How lovely to fall asleep to the sound of a lone flute. Very nice!

  8. Barbara Toboni

    I like it, Laura. It’s mysterious and dreamy and leaves you guessing about Paula’s life.

  9. admin

    Thanks, Jayne. I’m about to watch a couple episodes of the Pillars of the Earth miniseries. If I’m still awake after that I’ll hop over to your website and see what you’re up to.

  10. admin

    Thanks, Barbara. That’s exactly how it affects me. I haven’t known anyone quite like Paula, but there have been folks who’ve passed through the periphery of my life and have been arresting and intriguing.

  11. Jerry Kohut

    short and sweet, A lasting memory

  12. admin

    Thanks, Jerry. Isn’t it something how we never know which memories are going to be lasting? Some experiences and people more or less blend together over time, but others stay with us throughout our lives.

  13. marie

    I emailed it to her. The blog says she’ll put up people’s emails, but I see that mine’s not up yet.

  14. Lisa Shambrook

    Gorgeously lyrical and perceptive. I love people-watching and wondering about the people I see, the more mysterious, the better!

  15. admin

    Oh, I see. It must take Lillie a little while to get to it. I look forward to seeing the story when it’s up.

  16. admin

    Thanks, Lisa. I love what you did with the prompt, too, and will leave a comment on your site, as well. It’s a delight to make your acquaintance through these stories!

  17. Robin Leigh Morgan

    Sorry, I missed the launching of your revamped website. My debut YA Paranormal/Time Travel/First Kiss romance novel, entitled “I Kissed a Ghost” got released on December 20th. I’ve been busy marketing/promoting it since then; and right now there’s a problem with the view function on Amazon [it shows multiple fonts on a single page, waiting for correction to occur. It appears my book won a poll for a group read on GoodReads [Paranormal Addicts & Newbies group]. Anyway you said you wanted me to post an update on my book…I just did.

    Instead of replying to the first two posts separating, I’ve decided to try the two into one, where I’m talking about a cat and a set of houses, with a five sentence response using the “color” black. Where used Lillie’s prompt of Midnight, I took Obsidian as my prompt. So without any further adieu, here’s my comment:

    Jessica once had a cat that entered her life, and just like Paula, it had always been an independent creature.
    Jessica worked as a geologist, and since the cat had no name of its own, she called the cat Obsidian because of its’ black shiny fur.
    Obsidian always made her presence known beginning with a lyrical meowing; and ending with some motorboat purring once Jessica acknowledge her presence by scratching Obsidian under its chin.
    She loved playing with Jessica’s house keys, and always knew when to show up for attention especially if Jessica began to miss her after days of no seeing her.
    It therefore came as no surprise when Sandy had destroyed Jessica’s home and neighborhood; that the day Jessica arrived to remove the last of possessions which had survived the storm’s onslaught and threw her keys away on what used to be the lawn, when she got into her car, there sat Obsidian, the keys in her mouth, waiting to be taken to her new home with Jessica.

  18. admin

    You sure are a lot of fun to correspond with, Robin. I never know where your imagination will take things. I hope you have a most creative year ahead.

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