Refined back of book blurb

by | Oct 20, 2010 | Memoir, Musings, Reversible Skirt | 8 comments

For folks who are interested in the editing process, here is a revised version of the blurb for the back cover of Reversible Skirt.

When the mother of three little girls commits suicide, their father is desperate to keep his family together in the face of pressure from his in-laws to split the girls up. He remarries in haste and tells his daughters his new wife is their mother. The youngest, Laura, believes her mother must have gone through a kind of magical transformation.

Reversible Skirt, a memoir, unveils Laura’s interior as she sifts through remnants of her mother’s existence and struggles to fit into a community where her family’s strict rules are not the norm. When her father dies, Laura’s stepmother grows increasingly abusive, which propels Laura and her sisters into a lasting alliance. Their father’s wish that they stay together comes true, although not in the way he’d imagined.

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8 Comments

  1. Bernadette Pabon

    well written, informative nevertheless leaving an aura of suspense wanting the reader to read more.

  2. admin

    Thanks, Bernadette. I’m thinking about the different emotional impact of “wants more than anything to” and “is desperate to.” I put in “is desperate to” in this version because it’s shorter, making more room to work in the in-law conflict, but “wants more than anything to” stirs my empathy more than “is desperate to,” so I may change it back. There are other word choices I’m questioning, too. It’s always fascinating to me how nuances can make all the difference between writing something powerful and writing something ordinary.

  3. Lynda McIntyre

    I liked the tone of the prior version more. More impact. This one seems…more distanced? Just me.

  4. Ann Philipp

    Personally, I like the word desperate.

    When reading this version I got caught up in what you were saying, not how it was being said.

  5. admin

    I agree, Lynda.

  6. admin

    Well, that’s a good thing, but there is something about this one that doesn’t work quite right for me. I think Lynda hit upon it when talking about the tone. It’s hard to say, especially because it’s impossible, I think, to recreate the impact of a first reading of something with a slightly revised version because we already know basically what it’s going to say.

  7. Ruth

    I prefer the prior version…for me, the prior version seemed more emotional and personal. The latest version doesn’t seem to be YOU…it’s not as sincere. You wrote from your heart initially and now the blurb is becoming other people’s words.

  8. admin

    Ruth, I think you are exactly right. There comes a point when you just have to stop trying to improve what’s there, and with the second version I went past that point. When Kathy’s ready to work on the book, I’ll confer with her a bit on the final cover copy, but I’m certain at this point that it’ll be more like the first version than the second. I apreciate how honest you and my other friends have been in giving me feedback.

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